What a profound time to experience a spiritual awakening. Documenting this journey feels essential, as I believe it will serve someone one day. I understand now why I was born with such self-awareness: to recognize my body as the vehicle it is, to understand its limitations, and to explore the many layers I possess.
Cosmic forces affect us all in ways many are unaware of. This awakening touches everyone in one form or another. As we are all fragments of a greater Source, our journeys vary, but the underlying experience is shared.
We may exist on the same physical plane, yet we interact with entirely different frequencies and timelines.
Some of my experiences, particularly in the last couple of years, have been marked by extremes either absolutely thrilling or utterly despairing.
Experiencing a form of dissociation from the body.
Initially, it wasn’t very apparent and would come in waves. Now, when I sit in absolute awareness, I perceive my body in a way that’s hard to explain. To help you understand, I’ll use an example I read somewhere: the first time we see a bird is likely the only time we are truly aware of that bird. Every subsequent sighting is more about the memory of the bird than the actual experience. This applies to much of what surrounds us. Keeping up with our current society often means disconnecting from everything else, leading to a lack of awareness of our own bodies. Life becomes a mechanical process.
This dissociation was frightening at first, but it helped me realize that my body is just a canvas I constantly paint on, a mere vehicle for exploring life on Earth. Some other insights that came with this realization include:
The absurdity of our dependence on a vast array of food sources to function and survive. We need numerous minerals, vitamins, and nutrients. I believe an advanced version of ourselves would require minimal sleep and fewer food sources, or perhaps even a single source. This evolution would allow us more time for personal development, connection, and the advancement of our species.
The Fragility of Our Bodies: Dissociation made me understand our incredible fragility and physical limitations. We are not as strong or skilled as we might think, we look rather odd and we carry a lot of unproccessed food with us.
Increased Sensitivity to Others
Increased sensitivity to others can be both a blessing and a curse, depending on daily interactions. While I’ve learned to set boundaries, I still occasionally fall prey to external energies, making it challenging to regain my center.
Natural Moral Compass
You won’t need a moral compass to discern right from wrong; doing the right thing will become second nature. You’ll possess an innate understanding, and although it may be difficult to explain how you know what you know, this intuitive knowledge will guide your actions effortlessly.
Vulnerability without Weakness
I am very vulnerable, but not a pushover or prey to others. This is difficult to articulate, even to myself. I operate at a level where I have no strategies—nothing, zero. I almost don’t think; I simply exist within this realm with no judgement that comes from my mind or past experiences but rather from the center of my heart.
Perceiving People’s True Selves
I see people for what they are, regardless of how much they try to hide behind their layers. I can discern both the surface and deeper layers. How do I verify this? People often sense that I can see them and feel compelled to share their truths and stories. Those who are not ready to face themselves may feel an unexplained animosity towards me. I understand this reaction and I am not bothered by it, knowing I serve as a mirror for their development. I also detect those who try to read me or the room, bringing forth what they think I want to hear or what the room wants to hear. This stems from their need for acceptance and fear of rejection and this also I can understand as I have passed already this stage of my development. Probably the most challenging aspect will be dealing with our close family members, as maintaining objectivity is incredibly difficult. However, you will also begin to perceive them as vehicles for their own journeys, recognizing the unfortunate circumstances and experiences that have shaped their lives. This understanding allows for greater compassion and empathy, even when it is hard to remain detached.
Self-Awareness and Personal Growth
I see myself beneath my multiple layers. I observe my behaviors, my interactions, and recognize how I can be unjust to others or myself. I can measure my progress, and my self-awareness has increased tenfold. I see my body, my personality, and this vehicle as a whole, understanding the skills it possesses, as well as its misalignments and areas for improvement.
Lessons in Detachment
Whenever I get attached to something, it often gets taken away from me. This is one of my great life lessons: to let things go. Even if I love something immensely, I must continually practice detachment and respect everyone’s journey.
The Illusion of Status Symbols
Status symbols are meaningless to me now. I have a strong appreciation for beauty, but I no longer require social constructs like cars, houses, or nationalities. I see them as illusions designed to keep us from experiencing life fully and connecting with others.
Finding Joy in Simplicity
Switching one’s emotions becomes effortless. Joy is our natural state, and after enduring multiple ego deaths and dark nights of the soul, I find joy in the simplest acts. I have truly become a child again.
Overcoming Fear
Fear dies off. I used to worry about countless things, especially concerning the people I love, feeling responsible for everyone and everything. Now, I understand that this was a form of control, not love, and that I should stop interfering with everyone’s journey. While some might argue that we need to stay proactive and prepared for future circumstances, the truth is, we can’t control destiny. We can provide our children with tools and a straight path, but we cannot change their meaning and destiny in this world. If we are honest with ourselves, we would recognize that we often deceive ourselves when we say we are protecting others by controlling their choices. In truth, we are afraid of the pain we would feel when confronted with the suffering of those we love. The answer lies in investing in becoming sovereign beings and trusting that even if some things don’t make sense now, they will eventually.
Love becoming stoic
Though it may appear emotionless in many ways, it is now greater and more powerful than ever. It fills my entire being and has become an inherent part of who I am. While I cannot explain it to others or even fully comprehend it myself, it is an everlasting feeling. At times, it can be painful, but at its core, it is unconditional and so powerful that everything it touches can feel its presence.
Rejecting Transactional Relationships
I now realize how many of my relationships were transactional, often mistaken for love. True love is not attachment or a form of it. I can easily sense when people treat relationships like business deals, expecting something in return for their “generosity.” They keep a mental ledger of perceived debts and use emotional manipulation as currency.
Distinguishing Between Ego Gratification and True, Deep Love
Understanding the difference between people who stroke my ego and those who touch my heart has been a journey. While it’s enjoyable to have my ego touched momentarily, my soul seeks expansion, and true love will always be my true sanctuary. I will always choose no less than that.
Perceiving the Difference Between Being Alert and Being Aware
Being alert and being aware are distinct states. Alertness often stems from a place of fear or anticipation, a heightened state of vigilance driven by external stimuli. Awareness, however, is a more profound state of presence and mindfulness, an inner calm that comes from being fully in tune with oneself and the surroundings.
These insights have allowed me to navigate relationships and personal interactions with greater clarity and intention, fostering deeper connections and a more authentic existence.
Persistent Physical Symptoms
Persistent physical symptoms, such as pains and illnesses, can be seen as the body’s attempt to cleanse itself and reach higher states of light. As the Earth undergoes changes, we must adapt as well. This means our bodies need to become lighter. This translates to consuming smaller quantities and less variety of food, spending more time in nature, and experiencing various physical discomforts, especially in the feet and spine when we are ungrounded. Symptoms may include burning sensations, muscle spasms, headaches, flu-like symptoms, and days of extreme fatigue.
Vivid Dream States
The dream state becomes incredibly vivid. My dreams are absolutely insane, filled with a variety of colors, sensations, different timelines, and intricate plots. It’s almost like going to sleep only to wake up in another life, and most of the time, I wake up exhausted.
Love for Work
My love for work has become an integral part of who I am. I like to believe that I have always been hardworking, but as my spirituality has deepened, so has my desire to work diligently. It has become a defining aspect of my identity, and I no longer seek recognition for my efforts. While I appreciate acknowledgment, it does not influence the way I work. My dedication comes from a place of intrinsic motivation and a commitment to personal growth and contribution, rather than external validation.
Dealing with Doubt from Others
People often doubt my intentions, believing that my friendship and concern are too good to be true. I’ve learned that this skepticism reflects their inner selves and personal struggles. Despite this, I continue to stay true to myself and my path and don’t bother much to think about how others might percieve me.
Encountering Another Fragment of the Same Soul
On your path and according to your evolution, you may encounter another fragment of your own soul. This concept is debated by many, but it is real. I know this because I am experiencing it firsthand and after a lot of back-and-forth in my head and body, I have just learned to accept it as an inherent part of who I have become. My counterpart is oblivious to spiritual concepts and deeply entangled in this world, tortured by their fears and anxieties, yet they are making progress in their own way and most of the time, I can feel it. While I cannot and should not try to convince them of anything, I will always feel their energy around me. At times, it is downright heartbreaking to feel them spiraling down again, but interfering with their journey would only slow their progress. Allowing them the freedom to grow and evolve on their path, is a sign of ultimate love.
Trivial matters loose their grip on you
As it becomes easier to read into the collective consciousness and perceive life on a grander scale, many things start to feel meaningless. I find it increasingly difficult to understand how people get so triggered by the smallest matters. I’ve learned to move past such trivialities quickly. Although it’s not always the case, most of the time, I don’t even flinch at things that would have previously bothered me.
Rediscovering Meaning
Many things will lose their meaning—titles and possessions will be part of your life but will lose their meaning. Explaining this to others might be challenging, and you may appear a bit unconventional, but it won’t matter. By then, you will have achieved such freedom of mind that people’s opinions will no longer affect you. You’ll be liberated from societal expectations, embracing a state of true independence and self-awareness. This profound shift allows you to focus on what truly matters: personal growth, authentic connections, and inner peace.
You will discover that you never truly loved yourself or others.
The concept of love I once knew completely disintegrated. For me, the most painful realization was understanding that while I spent my entire life boasting about my love stories, I never once allowed myself to be fully vulnerable or to truly accept love. I lived through many experiences and built numerous memories, only to realize they had nothing to do with genuine love. When it came to encountering true love, I ran like hell. I was so afraid of it, feeling utterly undeserving, and many parts of me still reject it.
I will keep on documenting my inner journey and share it in my journal as I feel it will serve me or someone else one day. Meanwhile, the resources and teachers I use as help are numerous but I can count a few names that have helped me along my journey. See links below:
THE WONDERMIND 