I wanted to be perceived as beautiful. I wanted my eyes and lips and neckline to be mesmerising and sweet and tempting. I would observe myself in the mirror and contemplate how my cheekbones blend in with my round, hazel eyes. I took pride in my tall figure and walked it bold and entitled. Shoes … Continue reading Becoming
Sunsets are still singing to me, curving their long arms around my chest, clutching my heart then breaking into its monotonus twirling. The colours turn from talkative to serene to complete stillness. They speak into me the life that I have lost by fulfilling my now-resented dreams. What I hate most about my life is … Continue reading Now I lay my night to sleep
It has become very easy to die in this world while being alive. Just spend enough time with the wrong people and you will have some of your best features peeled off and then replaced with horrendous moods. It has become so natural to walk mindlessly, without observing the miracle of life. Sometimes, it feels … Continue reading Alive I am. Still.
And if today I could move anywhere, I would choose to move into a cotton throw. One that lays always near the chimney. A lenghty, stripped, wool blankie, with a burn mark and a warm, familiar smell. We would hug each other on a wooden chair and wait for the radio to share its afternoon … Continue reading No country for grown ups
I am affraid no longer to melt into the tempest of life. To respond with restful eyes to the bitter words that travel my way. I just lay back, curving the reality by storing wishes in the Akashic records. My cheek melts into a lucid dream every night, my eyes are engraving the ceiling every … Continue reading My onyx nights
My dear winter, you called me saying that you'll keep me warm under your sheets, that your walls will mould themselves around me. You said your hills are silent and no one will even dare to speak. Dear winter, I thought I came to forget but I came only to remember more. You wrapped me … Continue reading My dear winter
I forgot how music can often peel off those layers of "what I have to become" revealing the one I always needed to be. I forgot how the wind can take the shape of a long, heavy gown, while the sky becomes a silky cleavage adorned with shimmers. I forgot how the grass changes its … Continue reading How much do you remember?
More than money, I wanted peace. More than attention, I wanted respect. More than being right, I wanted to be understood. More than looking beautiful, I wanted to feel happy. More than seem strong, I wanted to feel courageous. More than being given things, I wanted to be gifted time. More than being approved , … Continue reading Woman me up!
I look up. Heavy textured clouds seem to blend in with the ash colored neighborhood, wrapping the trees with a pleasant stillness. It's warm and I feel immersed into the balmy weather. Midday... April, maybe May. I look at all the people who pass me by, holding sacks with groceries, stridently moving and chattering. I … Continue reading Greatful for all the moments I have yet to live
I'm crossing you in style some day Oh, dream maker, you heart breaker Wherever you're goin', I'm goin' your way Two drifters, off to see the world There's such a lot of world to see We're after the same rainbow's end, waitin' 'round the bend My huckleberry friend, moon river, and me. Audrey Hepburn see … Continue reading Story of a bipolar drifter